Separation Is So Hard

Being separated from my family for the past 10 weeks has absolutely wrecked me.

Both boys have been so poorly and I’ve had to sit here and worry.
I’ve been able to discuss things over the phone or via whatsapp but it’s not the same.

Yesterday I was taken to UHS for a doppler scan on my left leg. Everyone was concerned that I had a DVT as my leg was significantly bigger than the right one.

Thankfully I don’t have a DVT but have been put back on my antibiotics to try and help it get better.
Due to my scan I missed a therapy session which I was annoyed about. Today the therapist I was due to see was off sick so no therapy again. I’m due more therapy at 3 tomorrow.
It upsets me that I’ve missed 2 therapy Sessions this week. I need my therapy to get the best results possible.

Tomorrow I have to call Lewis’ class teacher and have his 6mth review over the phone.  I need to flag up a few things that we think need addressing.

At 1pm I have a Goal Planning Meeting which involves me and paul and the professionals involved in my care including my newly appointed social worker.
This meeting will discuss how far I’ve come (not far) and what I need to address to go home.

We are really hoping that we are given the go ahead to go to Naomi House Children’s Hospice on the 18th for a couple of nights. It will be a change of scenery and I’ll be able to go around there safely as it is fully adapted for kids in chairs etc. It will also see how I cope out and about (which scares me shitless)

On a positive note, today my friend Mel came up and we went for lunch in the hospital restaurant.  I tell you now the food they serve is so amazing. All ‘home’ cooked & big portions at a very reasonable price.

We had a great time just chatting. Poor Mel has Bells Palsy and is feeling really low. I know how she feels. They are looking at increasing my antidepressants as my mood is so low.

Speaking to the amazing friendly psychologist yesterday helped me get my head in a bit of a better place.  I think everyone is worried that my concern for the boys and Paul, may have an effect on my recovery

I’ve had my own wheelchair ordered and I’m kind of looking forward to it. Although it does concrete in that I’ll need it for home and out and about.

I guess I’ve got to accept that life is different now.

I’ve learnt as well that I’ve only got a couple of true friends now. So many people have jumped ship and left me alone.

I guess I only need those few friends and my family anyway.

Right time for bed.

Better get my feet sorted out before I go to sleep!

SN Mum

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