Not just emotionally (a whole other post to follow I’m sure) but physically. Oh My days how much weight can one person put on when trying to lose It??? It appears in my case to be a lot and boy is it getting to me!!

2 yrs ago just prior to falling ill I weighed a healthy 80+kg. I had a nice figure, was proud of how far I had come post kids (took 7 yrs to get there but I did!) and all was good.

2yrs on, wheel chair bound and weighing in at 108kg, I am mortified by how I look and feel!! I have 3 chins, massive thighs, a huge backside and an ever increasing waist line. None of them will budge and it seems like they all rather like being a part of me despite me trying desperately hard to lose them.

I’ve cut my calorie count by 400, I have gone from 2 teaspoons of sugar in my tea to 1/4 (or none depending on the member of staff). I eat pineapple and blueberries daily and have reduced my dairy intake (mainly cheese) by 2/3. I cant cut dairy completely due to having an area of osteopenia in my bones and I can’t take to high a dose of calcium supplements in case I get bladder stones and block my catheter.

I don’t eat chocolate,I drink sugar free flavoured water and have only 1 or 2 low calorie snacks a week.

So why after all of these changes have I put on another 1.2kg this week.

I’m losing my mind over this. Even the dietician can’t explain it.

What the hell is my body playing at?

I know my reduced mobility, more so now that I cannot walk the few metres with a frame like before, will automatically affect my weight buy seriously this much?

I’m at the stage that I am scared to eat and I know that’s a dangerous place to have my head at but I have no idea what I can do.

I wobble as I roll along, my Suprapubic catheter is stuck right in my belly crease and I swear it gets squashed!

It’s keeping me awake at night (as you can tell by the time of this post.

I need the help of all of you in Blogland. How can I lose this weight?

I’m already suffering with shortitis and I really do resemble a weeble!!

I know there are a few of you who will tell me it’s ok and natural in my current physical and mental state but I’m tired of trying and it failing.

I think I’m destined for a diet of fresh air alone.

Oh well time for bed said Zeberdee

I hear my bed calling……….

One thought on “Wobbling…..

  1. I can’t tell you how to lose weight, but I can tell you how not to. Do not starve yourself! Your body is like a furnace and it needs that fuel to keep running. Also do not get on the hype of diet foods ( most of them contain aspartame which is just not good) Cheese, as much as I love it is bad for me (packs on the pounds) so I take Calcium for osteopenia, just be sure you are taking vitamin d3 too, they need each other to work…..as far as any advice, you do one thing, drink one more glass of water, one more rep in physical therapy, and KEEP your head up!


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